The silver lining in this terribly dark cloud!

I was moved to tears this evening as I watched the Keith Olbermann show on MSNBC. Unless I missed something else, this might well be the first time a prime-time (heterosexual) TV anchor who has given the LGBTI community such amazing support and love.

Mr Olbermann thank you and God bless you - you give us hope!

Perhaps this is the silver lining in this dark cloud of misery following the passing of the same-sex marriage ban in California last week. This marriage ban, while nasty, mean and full of hate, man in fact bring out more support for our community than we have ever seen before. Stay positive friends and do not give up hope.

Below is the video of tonight's historic TV first - a 6 minute speech of support for Same-sex Marriage from a 'straight' man:

And if that was not enough to boost your faith in America and democratic free speech, have a look at this video from the Rachel Maddow show (also on MSNBC) of showing the thousands and thousands of people who have turned to the streets in protest this past week....

Day One of the Obama Brave New World? - Lesbian and Gays feel more invisible than ever.

“If there is anyone out there who still doubts that America is a place where all things are possible, who still wonders if the dream of our founders is alive in our time, who still questions the power of our democracy, tonight is your answer”

– President Elect Obama

As Obama made the above acceptance speech I could not help but feel the immense struggle between the desire to be excited and my feelings of disappointment. By the time his speech was being given I was already beginning to see that the people of California had banned Same-Sex marriage.

Yes, that night I certainly did see the ‘power of our democracy’ and I felt its power and ability to take away the rights of people.

There seems to be a lot of unhappy people wondering the streets of gay neighborhoods of America today. It is not just in California either. Lesbian and Gay Americans right across the nation are feeling the pain.

While the nation celebrates their new president – the first man of African heritage to hold the office – Lesbian and Gay people feel cheated out of the feeling of jubilation. I have witnessed several scuffles these past few days between gay people and Obama supporters so over joyed that they fail to care a moment about the grief Lesbian and Gay people are feeling.

As the results of the election came through at exactly 11pm Eastern Time I was sitting on my couch – pumpkin ale in hand – weeping with absolute joy. It was a wonderful moment. Yet within the hour as the results of proposition 8 to ban Same-Sex Marriage in California became clear my heart sank. All the joy of seeing Obama win was forgotten.

As Obama began to make his speech I was already becoming angry and skeptical. Not because I do not like him, but because I began to question if he is actually going to be able to do anything major to help LGBTI people in this nation.

News pundits – even before Obama gave his acceptance speech - began to suggest that this new administration would avoid all social issues like same-sex marriage, DOMA (defense of marriage Act) or Don’t Ask Don’t Tell (Lesbian and Gays in the Military). They will become a ‘middle ground’ administration – something I predicted during the primaries.

The ban in California is so alarming for it came from both sides of politics, both McCain and Obama voters a like. As Obama used his catch cry that we are ‘no blue states or red states – we are the United States’ I could not help but agree – yes they are the United States AGAINST Gays and Lesbians!

Young Lesbian and Gay people living here in the Deep South looked to California in hope. They saw it as the great liberal State of the west – it gave them hope – ‘it was the change they could believe in.’

On Tuesday night that was taken away from them and it will have a profound affect. Young LGBTI people in Kentucky that I have spoken to in these past few days are feeling forgotten, neglected and despised. They tell me that when they mention the ban of same-sex marriage they are told to ‘forget about it – Obama is here.’

Last night young LGBTI people of California took to the streets. They were angry, hurt and alarmed. They were forgotten and needed to make themselves known!

It was a spontaneous protest that according to the television networks went all through the night and into Thursday morning. Thousands of people took to the streets to show how they felt.

This is much worse than how Australian LGBTI people felt in 2004 when the Howard Government banned same-sex marriage, for this time it was a government TAKING AWAY already granted rights.

LGBTI people of America have a right to be angry.

Three lawsuits have been filed and I do hope that they succeed – several questions remains on all out minds however:

Will Obama and the new Democrat Congress repeal the ‘Defense of Marriage Act’?

Will Obama and the new Democrat Congress repeal ‘Don’t Ask Don’t Tell’?

Will Obama and the new Democrat Congress initiate federal same-sex partnership laws in immigration, taxation and social security?

Will he and they initiate Hate Crime legislation?

We now need to wait and see, in the mean time I hope LGBTI Americans continue to stand up and let their voices be heard – for today I feel we are just that little bit more invisible.

(these photographs are actual scenes from the past 24 hours - they are from the LA Times to see more click here)

A ‘united’ states of America? Land of Free? Land of Equality?

One thing both blue states and red states seem to unite on is oppression of Gay and Lesbian people.

This morning the TV is a buzz with news of the election of the nations first African American president. News anchors are saying things like “America has showed the world we really are the land of equality”. Straight friends of mine (and some gay) are over the moon and claim that this is the day the America was waiting for – ‘equality reins’.

As I awake I am much more hesitant to declare the nation free of oppression and division. Arizona last night banned same-sex marriage. Last night Florida banned same-sex marriage. One a red state and one a blue state – while they both have different visions for who they want to lead their nation they unite on oppression of Lesbian and Gay people.

The TV news is all quiet on this front however - once again LGBTI people are invisible!

Blue and Red states alike have shown their dislike for Gay and Lesbian people. Republican and Democrats, Obama supporters and Palin supporters alike all share one thing in common – their desire to take equality away from Lesbian and Gay Americans.

California – the state that so many in this country see as the epitome of liberalism – looks set to ban same-sex marriage. California is different than the other two states. So far 18,000 same-sex couples have been married in California (some twice due to it being taken away once before!) yet after last night their marriage may be annulled. This ban is an act to TAKE AWAY rights from people who already have them! That is the lowest of low.

That’s right – do not get too excited. I do not share my Australian friends over zealous enthusiasm for the fact “gay” was mention for the first time in a presidential victory speech. To me the words gay and lesbian have become the new liberal rhetoric, the words one uses to gain left or educate elite credibility. In reality Obama does not support any federal effort to save or create same-sex marriage.

If you ask people in America who gave African Americans freedom most will tell you Abraham Lincoln. Yet Abraham Lincoln and his Vice President (and later president) Johnson vetoed bills to grant Civil Rights for African Americans.

I was told last night as I began to despair over more marriage bans in this nation, to not be so angry as ‘change takes time’. The friend then said ironically ‘just look at black civil rights and how long they had to wait – it is now time for you guys to sit back and wait, it will happen’.

Gee, the condescension was obvious. I was not impressed as one could imagine.

I wonder if the LA rioters in the 1990’s would agree that they should have just sat back and waited? I wonder if Martin Luther King Jr would have agreed that he should have just sat back and waited and not made so much noise?? I wonder if the Black Panthers would have agreed to sit back and wait.

Back to the point raised by Obama and his supporter that America is now united – and back to his usage of ‘gay’ in his speech last night:

It's the answer spoken by young and old, rich and poor, Democrat and Republican, black, white, Hispanic, Asian, Native American, gay, straight, disabled and not disabled. Americans who sent a message to the world that we have never been just a collection of individuals or a collection of red states and blue states. We are, and always will be, the United States of America. – President Elect Obama Nov 4 2008

Ok so we are united?

Have a look at this early break down of the vote to ban Same-sex marriage in California:

African-Americans voted for the measure (to ban marriage) by a 69 percent to 31 percent margin. However, 55 percent of white voters and 52 percent of Hispanics voted against the proposition.

Californians who attend church weekly voted for Proposition Eight by a margin of 83 percent to 17 percent, according to exit polls. Those who attend church occasionally voted 40 percent in favor and 60 percent opposed. Californians who never attend church were 14 percent in favor and 86 percent opposed.

College graduates opposed Proposition Eight by a 57 percent to 43 percent margin. Those without a college degree favored it 53 percent to 47 percent.

Does this show a United States of America? It shows some major problems facing gay and lesbians in the years to come! I am amazed by the ironies here – 69% of African Americans supported the same-sex marriage ban! I have been told that in California in the weeks heading to the election campaign materials supporting the measure to ban marriage used Obama’s own words and automatic phone calls used his voice – yet his campaign only came out in support of Californian Marriage Equality a day before the vote! What message is this sending Americans?

Since Obama has repeatedly stated that this “is a state issue” we can expect very little on this issue from his administration. Am I expecting too much? No. I am only expecting what I would expect from a federal leader anywhere. I am expecting to be treated equally – especially from a campaign that said they are all about ‘equality’ and ‘change’.

Should I sit back and be quiet and know that ‘change takes time’? NO! Change does not take time! People take time!

It is time for the LGBTI community to take the message from the people – in 2008 it is still ok for both red and blue states to enshrine discrimination into state constitutions, with or without a president of color. It is ok in 2008 for states to TAKE AWAY your rights if you are gay or lesbian!!

I write this blog at 10am eastern Nov 5. I pray that I have been wrong and that by the end of today as more votes in California come in and the results will turn around. Even if they do keep in mind both Florida and Arizona still joined the majority of states in America banning same-sex marriage!

Still thinking of moving to Canada or New England?? – I may join you!

Happy (Canadian) Thanksgiving 2008

My blog posts are far from regular and I apologize to the people who have emailed me asking me to write more.

I am very busy with University School work, studying for the GRE (a graduate school entrance exam) and commuting back and forth to visit my partner and cats that sadly live 3 ½ hours away in a neighboring state.

But I cannot resist making a post this week. It is Thanksgiving Day in Canada and as I type I am packing my bags to make my very own “home-coming”. My Partner and I are driving up to Toronto to spend Thanksgiving weekend with his family.

It is a holiday celebration that is very foreign to Australians, yet with each year I celebrate it I am beginning to think that this celebration it my favorite!

It is one day of the year (well for my partner and I we get two…Canadian and American) where we truly stop to give thanks to the Ultimate for everything we have. Regardless of how little that may be or how big it is, we all stop to give thanks.

It is historically a harvest festival. In my neighborhood here in Kentucky everyone has placed Pumpkins in their windows, a few homes have put up scarecrows on their front lawns (although this may have more to do with Halloween coming up). Harvest is a wonderful thing to celebrate. We are acknowledging the divine help we have received within creation to provide us with food. For me I acknowledge the divine presence in all these foods too, for I like many I believe all things have been created in God’s image…not just humans (remember that next time you bite into that corn cob).

Every Thanksgiving I make sure I turn around and say “thank-you” to my supportive family in Australia as well as my supportive family in Canada. I am so lucky to belong to two wonderful families who love and support my partner and I.

This year however I want to dedicate my Thanksgiving to my mom and dad who love me unconditionally and who tell me that they love me on a daily basis (seriously…phone email skype whatever…I am told I am loved daily!) I could not ask for better parents.

I am also dedicating my Thanksgiving this year to my new Church in Nashville Tennessee, who unlike the church I grew up in, they believe that being gay is not a sin but another wonderful part of God’s amazing creation. My church supports me for who I am not for who I could have been. My church shows me true love and is a living example of the kind of ‘Kingdom on Earth’ that Jesus spoke of.

My previous two blog posts managed to make news in my hometown downunder.

It came as a surprise to me that my blog was being read by strangers. Of course it is read by strangers….but it is always a surprise none the less.

An article appeared in the local newspapers in my hometown with the headline “Church gay stance 'shock’ ”.

My purpose of writing the blog post was to both vent about the anxieties and depression that discovering the policy caused me, but also to make more people aware that in Australia churches do hold such views. (I am amazed at the people who attend such churches who have no idea about their churches policies…..)

Syndal Baptist church in their response to the reporters maintained their stance that homosexuality was a “life style choice” and that in their church they will “help them to look at a change of lifestyle”.

The ministers seem unaware at how dangerous such a stand is. As a child growing up gay I was all too aware of this “church dogma” toward LGBT people. I did not know my church felt this way (which I am happy about as it would have caused me no end of sorrow at the time) but I knew it was a general theory of Baptist Churches.

The “lifestyle choice” theory is dangerous. Here is why….

I knew I was gay at the age of 10. Well I didn’t know exactly what it was…but at age 10 my first crush was on another guy in my class, then male TV actors etc. I just thought every one else was like this until some guys at school told me they did not like other guys that way…..an awkward moment which luckily at that age everyone quickly forgot!!

The concept of lifestyle choice really confused me as a 10 year old. I was so upset at the time as I knew I had not chosen to be ‘this way’ and I knew that I would choose to be anything else but what I was. (let me clarify…I did not want to be that way because even as a 10 year old I could see that it was a long scary difficult path to go down!)

I prayed a lot.

I remember praying for God to make me attracted to girls. God didn’t!! I even used to force my self to look at girls in magazines…but nothing would happen!

It made me a very scared and sad teenager. I learnt how to hide this….and to be sure most people you ask would never think that during my teenage years I was anything but a happy young man; but in reality I was scared as anything!

Back to “lifesyle choice”.

The idea that my gayness was some choice made me think that I was bad – very bad. I felt like the kid at school who shoplifted or the kids at school who were truant. I desperately tried to change the choice that I could not even remember making!! It was not a fun time! It leads to young gay children developing into adults with the distinct impression that they are “bad” and that they are powerless to do anything about it, do you see where this can lead??

Then came the “child abuse” theory. Again this theory is demonstrated within the Syndal Baptist policy.

I need not tell you how much this confused me! I began to question everything!! Did I have repressed memories??? (that was the vogue thing at the time….) I became suspicious of everyone!

Being gay did not confuse me! Being told that I could choose not to be gay even when I knew I couldn’t, and then told that perhaps I had been abused…..well that confused me!

Syndal Baptist church may claim to be a welcoming church, but I can guarantee to you that there are probably 10 years olds just like I was, sitting in that church today very confused. Not confused because of their sexuality, but confused and scared because of what the church is telling them.

The church can claim to love people and be welcoming – but when you begin to suggest that people need help in changing their lifestyle – which mind you psychology has proven is not a lifestyle – you will do them a lot of harm! So what if you love me….you are screwing around with innocent children’s lives! It has to stop!

This can have devastating results – and Australia, with its alarmingly high teen suicide rate, we should do anything we can to stop this from happening!

Another devastating result is that the child may grow up and reject their faith. Now this is not devastating to most people….but to many and certainly to me it is. I can not tell you the number of times I meet a LGBTI person who tells me they “used” to be a Christian.

The sad thing is, it was not God who gave up on them or who deserted them, it was their Church. But when a kid rejects their church they usually reject the whole darn lot and if the church was the one thing sending that child messages of social norms and values, well the child is likely to reject them too – leading the child down the road toward delinquency. Ahh the self fulfill prophecy!

I was fortunate to have parents (back to my Thanksgiving theme) who eventually came round and supported me. My dad did extensive reading and research to find an answer. Both my parents graduated from the former “Melbourne Bible Institute” and so both had the ability to ask questions and find answers.

Well they did. My mum often tells me how they go to a church that they know will welcome me….not as someone who has made “the wrong choice” but as some one who is committing no sin for being gay just like God made them! Ironically they still both go to a Baptist church…..just goes to show how diverse Baptists are these days!!!

My parents left Syndal many years ago now, and I doubt they would go back there it fails the litmus test “will this place be ok for our son”.

So I am thankful this Thanksgiving for parents like mine. For Christians like the ones I meet every week who tell me that homosexuality is a part of Gods wonderful creation…perhaps even a gift from God….and for my supportive family both in Australia and Canada.

I just hope that like the journalist in Monash who read my blog, young gay Christian children are reading it also. If you are know that GOD MADE YOU THE WAY YOU ARE and GOD LOVES YOU! You do not have to change!! Being gay is not a “life style” nor is it a choice – there have been many who have gone before you, you are not alone.

Please email me if you are a young gay Christian. You are certainly not alone and you deserve the support you are looking for. While I am all the way over here in Kentucky I can put you in touch with gay supportive ministers or we can simply chat.

I should note before I head off to Canada, that Rev Bill Brown of Sydnal Baptist Church emailed me and agreed that one day when I am back in Austrlaia we could meet up and have a dialogue about these issues. I pray that this day will bring forth blessings.

Syndal Baptist Church - A welcoming Christian environment??

SYNDAL BAPTIST CHURCH
SUBMISSION TO BAPTIST UNION OF VICTORIA
HOMOSEXUALITY

---

1. We affirm that God's Word in Scripture is our ultimate authority in all matters of faith and conduct.

2. The Bible forbids homosexual practice (ie. sexual activity with a member of the same sex), and sexual intercourse between any persons outside of the covenant of a heterosexual marriage.

3. In applying the Scripture to personal and social situations we have a tension between law and love. Both must guide our responses to any situation of sinfulness. Law without love leads to pharisaism or hypocrisy. Love without law may mean we are too permissive. As with Jesus, our attitude to all people should be one of unconditional love, whilst upholding God's law.

4. Homosexuality is an orientation other than God intended for us. Many factors (including sexual abuse) may contribute towards a person having a homosexual orientation. Such people are lonely and feel marginalized by the church. So although we extend love and acceptance to them as persons, we will endeavour to help them move away from homosexuality and homosexual practice. Our church faces the challenge of providing support for them in this painful journey, particularly if they are HIV/AIDS sufferers.

5. Because of our responsibility to protect young people in particular, we will be careful to screen (discreetly) all leaders, but especially Sunday School teachers and youth workers in terms of their sexual orientation and practices. This applies to both heterosexuals and homosexuals.

6. Although 'sins of the spirit' (like pride and lovelessness) seemed to be most serious for Jesus, and recognising Paul's lists where both sins of the spirit and sins of the flesh are condemned together, we will be careful to encourage one another to abstain from all sins. However in our culture, heterosexual and homosexual sins adversely affect the emotional and spiritual health of persons and families to an unprecedented degree, and for that reason we will work hard to preach and practise biblical standards of moral behaviour.

7. Whilst we would not debar someone from church membership who has a homosexual orientation, we believe that any violation of Christian sexual ethics calls for a serious response: usually this 'discipline' will be carried out with discretion by the pastors and elders. Unrepentant sinners ought to be removed from the church membership, whatever their sins, to uphold the high moral integrity of God's people. But they at all times will be the focus of loving pastoral care. And we believe practising homosexuals should not be in leadership in any local church or in the pastoral ministry of our churches.

CONTACT DETAILS FOR SYNDAL BAPTIST CHURCH

(please let them know what you think of this policy!)

Phone +61 3 9803 9144
Fax +61 3 9887 7266
E-mail: admin@sb.org.au

Address
588 High Street Rd
Glen Waverley
Melbourne
Australia 3150

Are Fundamentalist Christians killing off marriage?

Are fundamentalist Christians killing off marriage? Are they in a round-a-bout way promoting de-facto relationships (common law) in Australia? I am starting to think so…

There are several fascinating observations that one can make about the current legislative history being written in Australia right now (for those of you who have been asleep the new Australian government is finally legally recognizing Same-Sex couples under federal de facto laws!!).

The first observation one can make is that our decision as a community to continue campaigning for Same-Sex marriage, after the marriage ban in 2004, has certainly led to a softening down in parliament in the area of relationship recognition. Just as Rodney Croome, Nick McKim and myself had predicted, by constantly calling for same-sex marriage (our ultimate dream) both the Labor and Liberal Party’s are eventually going to soften to the once inconceivable idea of ‘Same-Sex de facto’ aka Common Law Marriages.

If we had given up back in 2004 and stopped campaigning for marriage equality, simply calling for defacto recognition as our friends at the NSW GLRL and Rainbow Labor had wanted us to do…it is certain that the new Labor government and the new Liberal opposition would have never considered granting us what is on offer today!

The moral of the story folks is to always aim high, never give up, always ask for the best we can possibly dream of! (more on that thought later….) By calling for Marriage we have been handed De Facto recognition….for some a 2nd rate offer….for others this is all they desire. Regardless it would never have occurred had it not been for the constant calling for Marriage Equality by the TGLRG, ACE or AME.

My second observation is that the Christian Lobby (whom I struggle to see as being in fact Christian?) will always be against ANY reforms giving rights or recognition to Gay Lesbian, Bi or Transgendered people. When we asked for marriage they said No and suggested we ask for De-Facto rights. I remember doing an interview on Triple J one afternoon back in 2005. When I called for Marriage Equality, the Christian [sic] Lobby person also being interview said “why can you not simply be happy with asking for defacto rights”. Well surprise surprise, today when such a bill is in question they are just as motivated against it as they were in supporting the ban on marriage equality back in 2004. Today they are in reality telling us simply to be happy that we LGBTI people are allowed to ‘simply exist’ (I know for a fact some of them pray for homosexuality to be made illegal once more!)

Moral of that story folks is to ignore the Christian [sic] Lobby and always campaign for what you want and what is right! They will always stand against what ever we ask for!

A third observation that is becoming clearer each day is that the Christian Lobby in their efforts to stop us from getting married or have de facto recognition, are in fact destroying marriage!

Why?? What? Christians destroying marriage? Yes….

Something amazing began to happen when legislators and courts began to allow same-sex couples to marry. Suddenly a whole group couples in society began to have legal protection and recognition of their relationship. More and more same-sex couples were drawn to declare their legal life long commitments and more and more same-sex couples began to feel that yes their relationships do matter. This had the flow on affect in making many same-sex couples (regardless of if they chose to marry or not) respect their relationships even more. I have been told by numerous couples, some married, some not, that suddenly they began to think that Lesbians and Gay men can and indeed do have the ability to have life long relationships.

I have seen with my own eyes younger gay kids who have grown up with same-sex marriage all their adult lives. To them it is the ‘way it has always been’. (time flies!!) They do not have the same relationship hang-ups that a lot of us older folks did 10 years back. I believe that marriage equality has had a positive influence on our young folk, something people like the Christian [sic] Lobby SHOULD be supporting!

Same-sex couples have been on the outside of reality looking in for such a long time that many of us had began to reflect the very image that society thought we were….perpetual singles full of lust and loveless relationships. Same-Sex marriage and or increased relationship recognition has made our very own community begin to realize that yes our relationships exist and have value! A man once said to me ‘I never thought growing up that as a gay man I couple have a long term relationship…now I know it is not only possible…it is legally a reality’. WOW!

It is here where I believe the institution of marriage became strengthened. Thousands of couples who had once been denied lined up to take part, and because they had been denied it so long most of them began to value the institution very much (for some it was a big challenge from what they knew….more on that another day….).

The Australian Christian [sic] Lobby however have embarked on a campaign that in my belief is only devaluing and destroying marriage to a majority of Australians.

The noise coming out of the ACL is disturbing. I am starting to come to the belief that the ACL truly is beginning to believe that Marriage is only for Christians….and by Christians I mean their own form of ‘Christianity’. Will they begin to argue that Muslims, Jews and Hindu’s should not be allowed to marry in Australia?? (this is not too far from reality…it has been attempted in the past)

A few years back this argument actually did almost become a reality in Alberta Canada. As the government began to legalize same-sex marriage across the nation the Premier of Alberta, Ralph Klein, resisted any effort too bring marriage equality into his province. His final and last ditch attempt was to call on the province of Alberta to stop issuing marriages and to leave marriage up to - you guessed it - the “Church”. In other words his argument was that marriage was a “Christian institution” and for “Christians Only”. He said that if a non-church member wanted to marry (including same-sex couples) they could simply apply for common law protection…aka De Facto status. However to become married you would have to go to a church for this and it would be up to the church’s own laws and regulations….(interesting enough this actually meant that same-sex couples could marry as the Unite Church of Canada already allowed it!)

So their argument became clear, marriage is owned by them, period.

This week as Attorney General of the Australian Capitol Territory, Simon Corbell, stood up to talk about the new legislation to allow same-sex de facto relationships (common law) the Australian Christian Lobby in the audience began to heckle him, what I think is interesting is what they actually said…

Simon Corbell asked “I’m in a defacto relationship, is my relationship any different, any less loving than someone who is married?”

The ACL people in the crowed yelled back “YES”.

So the truth comes out. The ACL believe that defacto relationships are “less loving” than marriages. Wow!

So how does this ACL grandstanding affect marriage?

Well…lets look at a few things.

Firstly a majority of Australian heterosexual couples that marry live together before marriage. In fact according to statistics, a majority of heterosexual couples in Australia have lived in a sexual relationship together prior to marriage.

In other words, a majority of married couples in Australia were once DeFacto couples with each other at some point in time. Did they suddenly realize then wanted to marry to gain love?

Now the ACL are yelling out at the Capital Territory Attorney General Corbell, who is in a Heterosexual Defacto relationship, so it appears that they are not just against recognizing same-sex defacto couples, but also opposite sex couples and ALL defacto relationships! (I remember this one from my Baptist church upbringing – oh more on this further on!)

In doing so they are making marriage to look more and more like an elitist institution for the privileged few (the few who actually live the life according to Leviticus that is…which mind you also allowed Abraham to have more than one wife…I digress…).

The ACL and fundamentalist Christians are making marriage look rather ridiculous and if you ask me are becoming walking advertisements against marriage!

Don’t get me wrong! I love marriage! I think it is great! BUT we need to make sure that people like the ACL do not hijack the institution that belongs to all couples…not just them!

So here we have it folks….we have the ammunition once and for all to draw more and more to the side of marriage equality.

* Timeline of Australian Christian Lobby stances *

- 2004 Marriage is for one man and one woman only.
- 2007 De Facto relationships are for one man and one woman only!
- 2008 De Facto relationships are LOVELESS
- 2009? De facto relationships should be banned for all????

It is time to get the majority of Australian couples who are or have been in defacto relationships, same-sex or opposite sex together and be a single chorus for change!!! Whilst up until now the ACL have hidden their true colours and only attacked same-sex couples (for fear of stirring the masses) they have now shown that they believe that legislation in Australia is only their to protect them….no one else…and that means the majority of opposite sex couples who have remained silent on Marriage equality should now be informed that the ACL are coming for them next….that is unless they help us now!

Syndal Baptist Church – Melbourne Australia

Ok folks. So I have been a little grumpy of late. Not only have I been with out electricity for 5 days (thanks hurricane Ike) but I have been stirring up old demons.

Have any of you seen “Sordid Lives” with Lesley Jordan? Have you seen his fantastic play “Southern Baptist Sissies” ? If not you should….

As a former Baptist (and as I like to point out Australia is a lot further south than here my friend) I have dealt with a lot of issues concerning my own faith and sexuality.

I recently discovered however the most disturbing thing ever! The church I grew up in “Syndal Baptist Church” on the corner of Blackburn Rd and High Street Rd Glen Waverley still has a disgusting policy suggesting that Gay people are the result of sexual abuse and are some how in that respect ‘damaged goods’.

Have a read of the policy for yourself….

Not only is Syndal Baptist church automatically equating Gay people to “Child Sexual Abuse” but they are still suggesting HIV/AIDS is a gay disease, we are a ‘violation of sexual ethics’ and we must be screened out of church leadership and in their own words ‘especially Sunday school teachers and youth workers’.

These are fully loaded sentences!!

Well my friends they did not screen me out! This policy was well in place when I was a Sunday school teacher amongst them.

I stopped going to Syndal as a teenager. It was a difficult decision in my family, for everyone else went every Sunday, not just once but several times a Sunday and several other times during the week! I would find any way possible to avoid the place!

You see I knew I was gay at a very young age….like most of us do. I knew the church had such thoughts and views and believe me I was not sticking around to have my teenage emotions played with by people who in reality have no education in such an area.

I contacted Syndal Baptist church recently to ask if this is still their policy. The senior Paster there, who was the same man in charge when I was a kid, informed me that whilst he would word it slightly differently today, their response is still consistent with it.

This actually shocked me.

Some people I know have no idea why this actually affected me so much recently. Put it simply I think I spent more time at that church growing up than any where other than school and home. It was in fact my ‘home’. I was taught from birth that church was my home, it was a place where I was loved no matter what and it was a safe place.

Reading what to me is a message of hatred and dangerous opinions as the church policy of my ‘home’ has made me feel like I have lost my childhood home, I have lost my family, I have lost my childhood. All those great memories I have of church as a kid have been destroyed with one document!

When I discussed it with my Mom she tried to consol me, yet when I pointed out that under this policy the church believed that I must have been “sexually abused” and am now a possible threat to others I explained that they are judging my parents just as much as they are me! Of course I probably could have refrained from pointing this out but it just came out like things do…..but this is really what they are doing!

Any way I needed to share this policy with someone so thanks for reading!

If you are as enraged as I am, and especially if you are a Baptist please write to this church and start asking them some questions! Email the Rev. Dr Bill Brown their ‘leader’ and ask him to please explain!

Christian Youth Camps

As all this was going on I heard the news from back home that the Christian Youth camps from Phillip Island Victoria, where I attended almost every year growing up, turned away a camp of children in need. They were in need because they were young kids dealing with their sexuality and needing a caring environment. CYC turned them away! Really Christian hey??

The camp was to be put on by WayOut a regional gay and lesbian youth suicide prevention group.

The case is now before the Australian Human Right Commission! In the meantime the camp met at another Christian campsite this time that of the YMCA...oh the hilarity!

Oh well…just another part of my fond childhood memories that are becoming tarnished!

Well I must get back to my homework and hope that the power comes back on soon! I am currently on the 5th days without electricity due to Hurricane Ike!

"And the Best is LOVE"

Trust steadily in God, hope unswervingly, love extravagantly.
And the best of the three is love. – 1 Corinthians 13:13 (The Message)

I have been spending my summer vacation consuming satellite TV news, reading newspapers and getting up to date on world events and issues. It is not a happy little world out there and to be honest I wish I had the brain of a child, for if I did I could easily hide myself away from the world, sheltered from all the awful and pointless things that go on.

It appears to me that so much of our world’s problems are driven by ‘hate’, or at least some kind of hate fueled resentment.

Over the weekend I drove up to Louisville Kentucky and along the way my partner and I turned off the highway to make a visit to the former ‘SHAKER’ village of ‘South Union Kentucky’.

Most people know very little about this religious sect, especially in Australia where the Shakers never made it. They were not like the Amish or Mennonites, for the Shakers believed quite strongly in keeping up with modern technology (in fact in South Union the Shakers were 50 years a head of the local Kentuckians….which understandably fueled resentment). Their beliefs were not really that radical, nor were they at all conservative.

The original Shakers in fact came from the Church of England and others from the Methodists. They were a protestant monastic order and yes they were ALL celibate. They were also not evangelical in nature and did not believe in going on massive recruiting drives. If you wanted to be a Shaker, you would come to them (perhaps this is why they died out? – no there were much greater sociological and historic forces at work ending the Shakers….but that is another story all together).

The Shakers lived out their days happily together in communes in the 1800’s perhaps quite like the Hippies of the 1960’s! They were a friendly and hospitable folk, who took in many orphans; no not to indoctrinate them, but to bring them up with the full spectrum of worldly views and at 18 allowed them to stay or go…..in fact many of the orphans did leave only to come back at their own decision years later.

The Shakers knew God’s message of LOVE.

As we drove back from Kentucky to Nashville we decided to turn off the Highway to have some dinner in a little town near the state border.

It must have been a town of all of 100 people. We had seen a sign for an all you can eat Southern BBQ Buffet with plenty of Catfish! As we drove down the main street of the town a massive sign, as big if not bigger than any house, towered over the town. The sign was dark black with blood red writing. It was the 10 Commandments, with a little extra added for good messure (including Homosexuality is evil which I am yet to find written so precisely in the bible? Regardless of the translation)…..several smaller signs dotted the landscape, in shop windows, in farms and hung from trees.

It was rather scary to be honest!

Not that I was about to go off and commit murder, adultery or anything (perhaps homosexuality however??) but it still left me with quite the feeling of hate. I am sure the locals believe that they are the best little Christian town for they have the most signs in all of Kentucky! But sadly I believe they have miss-understood God’s message of love completely.

1 Corinthians 13:1-7 (The Message)

1 If I speak with human eloquence and angelic ecstasy but don't love, I'm nothing but the creaking of a rusty gate. 2If I speak God's Word with power, revealing all his mysteries and making everything plain as day, and if I have faith that says to a mountain, "Jump," and it jumps, but I don't love, I'm nothing. 3-7If I give everything I own to the poor and even go to the stake to be burned as a martyr, but I don't love, I've gotten nowhere. So, no matter what I say, what I believe, and what I do, I'm bankrupt without love.

I love the above translation of 1st Corinthians 13. Don’t we all know what a rusty gate just sounds like?? This passage stands out when I think of such little towns as the one we stumbled upon. The town should not be going around telling every one of God’s law from the Hebrew Text or even adding their own laws (homosexuality no less)….they should have giant signs up in the town that say “God loves you…YES you!” or “God loves us all”. But this is not the message they choose to hear.

Ironically the Leviticus verse they used to condemn homosexuality comes from a story about a city that God supposedly destroyed for not being hospitable….ironic hey!?

We turned on the radio to catch the news as we drove out of the town and to get out minds off those darn signs…. “Man opens fire in side church – says he did not like their liberal stance on gays”.

Wow! What is with all this hate??

A man here in Tennessee walked into the Tennessee Valley Unitarian Universalist Church on Sunday and pulled out his gun, opening fire on the worshiping congregations.

We are told by associated press that the man ‘targeted the congregation out of hatred for its liberal policies, including its acceptance of gays’. He left a four page letter in his car, assuming he was going to die in the shoot out (he didn’t die and is in custody being investigated for hate crimes). The letter tells us about his ‘hatred’ for ‘liberals’ ‘gays’ and those who ‘vote democrat’.

Jim Adkisson targeted the Universalist Church because they are well known for their acceptance of both Woman and the LGBTI community. Does it not disturb you that Adkisson was so driven by hate for ‘gays’ and those who support ‘them’ that he went into a church and killed them?? Where does this hate come from?? Why did he feel that it was justifiable to do such a thing??

This church certainly knows Gods message of Love, perhaps this is why it was targeted? Their website aptly states "Love is the spirit of this church, and service is its law. This is our great covenant: To dwell together in peace, to seek the truth in love, and to help one another - James Vila Blake"

What the mainstream media has not linked to this crime is that this ‘Hate’ is being seeded and fueled in the minds of ordinary people by such a huge spectrum of people. The Westboro Baptist Church have a website ‘God Hates Fags . com’ with a headline ‘God Hates Fag Enablers’. If you have ever heard the Church Ministers from Westboro Church preach you could very easily take their message to encourage the type of behavior that Adkisson did, for all he was doing was silencing and killing ‘enablers’.

The hate is also seen in the world wide Anglican or Church of England communion with their recent ‘hate driven’ splits and arguments over ‘gay ordination’ or the ordination of woman (gay or straight!).

This hate is everywhere!

As I ate my breakfast yesterday I was desperately searching for a way to blog about this, that was until I looked down at my pajama t-shirt which says “The greatest is Love 1 Corinthians 13:13”. It was a T-shirt handed to me at Nashville Pride by a local United Church of Christ member. This is love! This is what God told us to do!

1 Corinthians 13:13 is exactly the message we need to be spreading in this hate filled world. No more of this “Thou shalt not….” Or “burn in hell” type preaching!

BUT

And this is a big BUT…..the burden of Love is not just on the side of the Christians. I call on every one else to be apart of this global love fest!

I was listening to Australian Radio Triple J the other day and was listening to my favorite radio show ‘Sunday Night Safran – with John Safran and Father Bob’.

Catholic Priest Father Bob pointed out to John that his car has a sticker on it that says “Sponsor a Lion for World Youth Day – 300,000 Christians in one Stadium!” a reference of course to when the Romans threw Christians and others to the lions in side ancient stadiums.

I was rather shocked to hear that John Safran would have such a ‘Hate filled’ sticker on his car, especially being Jewish and being familiar to where similar hate for religious groups has sent human kind before!

But I was saddened even more when I discovered that this sticker was being promoted by the new Australian Secular Party. This is not my first time seeing hate literature come from the Secular Party of Australia!

During the last election in Australia I read many pamphlets from the new ‘Secularist’ party. All spread a great deal of ‘hate’ against all religions, but especially Christians.

Ironic how as humans our only solution to ‘hate’ is to spread more ‘hate’ ??

I was rather annoyed as a gay man that I was targeted by the Secular Party to vote for them!!??? They assumed that since I was gay I would not be Christian. They bragged about how they would do all they can to silence the ‘Christian Minority’ if elected ?? ??

When I told them I was a Christian AND Gay they had just as much of a hard time comprehending this as the Fundamentalist Christian party ‘Family First’ did when the approached me.

To me, both the Family First Party and the Secular Party are speaking with the same tongue, the tongue of hate. Gay and or liberal Christians reading this, let me assure you, Atheists (like Richard Dawkins) dislike you just as much as the Family First fundamentalist crowd, we make Christianity look like the good guys they are supposed to be.....if there were more of us the arguments coming from them would have no strength!

There was much more the ‘Secular Party’ could have said during the Catholic World Youth day then ‘feed them to the Lions’?? Yeah I know it was supposed to be humorous, but turn the joke around and we would be in court for a hate crime (perhaps a Christian group needs to sue the Secular Party for Hate Crimes ?? anybody?)

Let me put the record straight on Catholics too. They have come along way on the issue of Homosexuality and are continuing this journey. I have great faith in God that eventually, like many other church’s, the Roman Catholic Church will one day be fully inclusive of LGBTI people; they already believe god ‘made’ us LGBTI and that it was not some human choice. The Secular Party should have been spending their time and money fighting the Family First Party (who still believe it is our choice to be gay!?)

HATE and prejudice is also very much alive and well amongst the LGBTI community

It is all too easy as a marginalized minority group to go down the road of ‘throwing stones’ back….but we need to be the better people and live by example.

When I was in a position of leadership within the Australian LGBTI community I always maintained the mantra of Love not Hate. My arguments FOR same-sex marriage were always about the Love it brings. I never spread hate against my foes.

However I am increasingly seeing LGBTI people and groups use hate as a way to get a head in a fight. When I lived in Sydney I remember being asked by my Gay Neighbors why I was friends with another neighbor who was a straight man and a ‘dirty Muslim’. I bluntly responded by explaining to them “that man has been a better neighbor than either of you have ever been, he has shown more love to us than the pair of you”. They were speaking of the same man who would come to my door and offer me food and ask me to join him and his girl friend for dinner and yes, Muslim holy-days. The two gay men never knocked on my door.

Recently in a Victorian newspaper it was suggested that Same-Sex Marriage in Victoria would lead to Polygamy. A LGBTI spokesperson fired back understandably.

It was not that he wrote back, it was WHAT he wrote back. He opened attack against polygamist relationships and polygamist groups suggesting that they were not good and were nothing like LGBTI relationships…..it was not the fact that this was particularly untrue, for there are ‘polygamist’ gays (and some legally married ones too) it was the fact that he immediately with out thought threw back attack and value judgments on polygamist relationships.

We have no right to judge ‘Polygamists’ just as no one has right to judge same-sex relationships.

Polygamy is not for me!! Nor do I really agree with it. BUT it is certainly not the time to begin throwing out ‘HATE’ against minority groups.

I live in a Country where Polygamist Mormons (and other religions, especially amongst refugees from Afganistan) are increasingly common. In fact in British Columbia a recent government report has suggested legalizing their relationships to ensure equal protection for the wives!

This is another issue where I am not going to go down the path of today.

But I do want to point out that as LGBTI people we CAN NOT attach our arguments to the putting down of other beliefs, religions, groups or customs. We must only go out into the world and live our lives of LOVE and hope that this will wash off onto everyone else!

It is not an easy thing to offer up love to those who show us hate. However this is exactly what we are called to do. Even if you are not Christian and a completely 100% Atheist, surly Love should be your mantra too? Ignore the hate that comes from our foes, remember you teachers at school who told you to be the ‘better person’ and walk away? They were right.

One of the victims in Sundays church shooting is coming out against the death penalty for the gun man. In fact he says that the shooting on Sunday made him change from being supportive of the Tennessee Death Penalty to being against it. His church, like many, are against the death penalty for they can see that Hate is not answer for Hate.

Perhaps we should take heed from the simple lives of the Shakers? Even under fire from outsiders, the Shakers never threw any stones back. I only wish I had the courage and strength to live my days out monastically as they did.

I will leave you with a beautiful passage from 1 Corinthians 13, often used at weddings, in fact very often used at Same-Sex Weddings.

Read it, read it again, soak it up and think about what it is saying to we people living in these Dangerous Times.

Love never gives up.
Love cares more for others than for self.
Love doesn't want what it doesn't have.
Love doesn't strut,
Doesn't have a swelled head,
Doesn't force itself on others,
Isn't always "me first,"
Doesn't fly off the handle,
Doesn't keep score of the sins of others,
Doesn't revel when others grovel,
Takes pleasure in the flowering of truth,
Puts up with anything,
Trusts God always,
Always looks for the best,
Never looks back,
But keeps going to the end.

1 Corinthians 13:7 (The Message)